Annoying People At Parties
Without them a party will be plain boring and incomplete until they spill a drink over you. But they sure as hell can be annoying. Grab on to your drink and read all about the people you don’t want at your next bash.
Click a chick: She has a camera and she is not afraid to use it. You have been warned. The party started at 9 p.m and a picture has already made its way to Facebook and on Instagram for the whole world to know about the soiree. Pictures of every angle and awkward moment will be documented. Don’t forget the duck faced selfies. Your retinas will burn for the rest of the night. She will make you take part in her planned portraits and force a smile on the count of three. And you better smile like you mean it. There is no escape and everything will end up online the next day. You think a hangover the next day is bad? Try waking up to notifications of people commenting on your drunken pictures from last night.
Space Invader: Travelling by Mumbai locals has skewed our sense of personal space hasn’t it? Yet the space invader will find a way to invade whatever little bubble of personal space you have left. They seem to think you won’t understand anything they say until you can feel their warm breath on your face. You politely take a step back, and they will take a step forward or lean in. The two of you will be engaged in a tango of awkwardness until the person gets distracted by someone else. If this happens to be you, please, for the sake of everybody, step away!
The Hot Mess: They’ve had too much to drink and too quickly. Yet they assure you that they aren’t drunk. You will find them either drunk texting their ex or hugging a random person and telling them how much they love them. They are slurring, stumbling and soon become the space invader, as they bathe your face with their liquor coated breath. Can’t locate them at the end of the party? They are probably passed out on the bathroom floor.
The Wannabe DJ: The host has carefully selected the playlist for the party. But the wannabe DJ doesn’t approve of the Sheilas and Lungi Dances. They will come armed with their own songs, yank off your iPod or laptop and connect theirs. Those songs sound similar to robots making out and banging on a can at the same time. To make things better they will change the song every two minutes just as people have started to dance. Do not even try to recommend a song to this person. They will give you a glare that will make your drink freeze over.
The Destructor: Usually calm and sane when sober, this person’s inner Hulk is unleashed when booze hits their system. They cannot handle their alcohol and is seen thrashing about on the dance floor. They wave their hands like they just don’t care, because they really don’t and will stumble through walls, equipment and people leaving a trail of debris as they go. Bottles will be flung, glasses will be broken and brawls will be started. Of course, they will not remember anything the next day and will refuse to pay remuneration.
The Woo-girls: No party is complete without the woo girls. Alternating between woos and Oh-my-gawds, the drunken cheerleaders will woo at everything from a new entrant, a duck faced potrait, or to the next song the wannabe DJ plays. The piercing echo of their high pitched woos will play in your head for the next two days.
The Sleaze: Girls pull the hems of their skirts lower when he is around. This person has no boundaries and will hit on anything with two legs. Remember the guy who tries to get behind you on the dance floor. He is the one. They will try their luck with every girl at the party. The drunker, the better. He unusually ends up getting into a tussle with some girl’s boyfriend and is punched in the face.
The Titanic: Their life sucks. They just got dumped. Their boss hates them. The alcohol served at the party doesn’t meet their expectations. They don’t know anyone at the party. There is always something this person has to complain about and will be a downer. Stay away from this one or they will take you down with them. Someone please take them home.
Would you like to add to our list of annoying people? Tweet to us @get_inonit and @curly_wurlygirl with your feedback.